This is day 3 of our 10 day transformation series, Liberate Yourself From the Blame Game. We are following The Success Principles(TM): How to Get from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be by Jack Canfield.
How To Liberate Yourself
As we discussed in Day 2, in order to create the life of your dreams you have to take 100% responsibility for your life. This means giving up on ALL excuses and valuing all excuses as equal. This also means giving up on blaming all outside circumstances and influences forever in order to liberate yourself. You have to take the position that you always had the power to make the right decision to produce a particular desired outcome. While you can’t change the past, you can decide that from this point forward you will choose to act as if you have 100% responsibility over things that do or do not happen to you.
Liberate Yourself: Formula For Success
In Jack Canfield’s book, The Success Principle, he illustrates the following idea:
E + R = O
(Event + Response = Outcome)
Every outcome in your life is the result of our response to events which we do not control. We cannot control events. They just are. Events are the existential reality of life.
Everything you experience today, both internally and externally, is the result of choices you have made in the past or how you have responded to a previous event.
If you don’t like the outcomes you are getting in life, or the relationships you have with people, then you must change your response.
You only have control over three things in life:
- The thoughts that you think.
- The images that you visualize.
- Your behaviors and actions you take. This includes what you say to yourself and others.
How you apply these three responses will affect every outcome you experience. If you don’t like what you’re getting or experience in life you must change how you respond to events and people. But 100% of the responsibility is on you. The 12 Step Program defines insanity as “continuing the same behavior and expecting a different result”. The laws of the universe just don’t work that way.
Your life will begin changing once you start changing your responses. If you want something different, YOU must DO something different.
Change your negative thoughts to positive thoughts. Change those things that influence you to align with your higher goals and desires for success and a better life. Change your friends. Change bad habits to good ones that will better serve you like a minimum 30 minute daily reading, watching and listening to those resources that will empower you to act and think in a way that will bring successful results.
You Must Stop Blaming
No one can make you do anything, period. You can allow someone to influence your actions, but no one can take control of your body and thoughts to make you do something you don’t want to do. You have a choice. It’s what you tell yourself after the event or person impacts you that triggers your response. If something or someone causes a reaction in you that doesn’t align with your vision of success, then make a mental note of it so that you can work on that issue later. But don’t react to it. Respond in a way that aligns with your higher goals.
Your Beliefs Influence Your Response
What you believe is what will influence your response to events and people. Daily visualization and affirmation exercises allow you to change your beliefs, which will affect your responses. Visualize your ideal life…experience it through all your senses. Write it down. Affirmations are positive traits and qualities of who you are or want to become that you speak out loud to yourself. Do this every day and every night before bed. Another daily exercise you should do is to make and keep a list of all the things you are grateful for. Read and add to this list everyday. As you do these exercises everyday, take note of how your responses start changing.
You will enjoy the following presentation by Jack Canfield on liberating yourself from the blame game:
Activity #1: Create a list of 5-10 blaming behaviors that you are going to stop doing. Consider those blaming behaviors that don’t align with the list of 5 goals you created in Day 1.
Activity #2: Create a list of new behaviors that will allow you to reclaim power over your own life and will support your list of 5 life changing goals for this year.
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